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You Know You Are Bullied At Work When ...
Experiences outside work
you feel like throwing up the night before the start of your work week
your frustrated family demands that you to stop obsessing about work at home
your doctor asks what could be causing your skyrocketing blood pressure and recent health problems, and tells you to change jobs
you feel too ashamed of being controlled by another person at work to tell your spouse or partner
all your paid time off is used for "mental health breaks" from the misery
days off are spent exhausted and lifeless, your desire to do anything is gone
your favorite activities and fun with family are no longer appealing
you begin to believe that you provoked the workplace cruelty
Experiences at work
you attempt the obviously impossible task of doing a new job without training or time to learn new skills but that work is never good enough for the boss
surprise meetings are called by your boss with no results other than further humiliation
everything your tormenter does to you is arbitrary and capricious, working a personal agenda that undermines the employer's legitimate business interests
others at work have been told to stop working, talking or socializing with you
you constantly feel agitated and anxious, experiencing a sense of doom, waiting for bad things to happen
no matter what you do, you are never left alone to do your job without interference
people feel justified screaming or yelling at you in front of others, but you are punished if you scream back
HR tells you that your harassment isn't illegal, that you have to "work it out between yourselves"
you finally, firmly confront your tormentor to stop the abusive conduct, you are accused of harassment
you are shocked when accused of incompetence despite a history of objective excellence, typically by someone who cannot do your job
everyone -- co-workers, senior bosses, HR -- agrees (in person and orally) that your tormentor is a jerk, but there is nothing they will do about it (and deny saying what they said later when asked to support you)
your request to transfer to an open position under another boss is mysteriously denied
Dr. Gary Namie
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